I couldn’t even be spared a page
In your first publication.
Nor, I imagine, a thought
In the last decade.
You spoke often of your own grief,
Of the sorrow he gave you,
But not a word of the torment
You inflicted upon me.
I suppose it is easier, more convenient
For us, to dwell on ourselves.
Other people are, after all, an eternal,
Unyielding, inscrutable mystery.
Except for you. You were never
A mystery to me. I wonder
Sometimes, late at night, if you
Have ever imagined
Ever imagined how earth-shattering
How heart-wrenching, how
Blood-curdling and mountain-crushing
You were to me.
I wonder if you know that my life
Changed forever because of you.
That my path, my destination, my
Destiny, were all eternally destroyed.
I wonder if you know that when I heard
That he so foolishly abandoned such a precious gem
I wept uncontrollably; I screamed; I bellowed;
And I raged against god
I wonder if you know, that my one desperate prayer to Him
Before I forever turned my back on Him in spite and fury
Was that He never let you feel the pain
That you had gifted me.
The Frog
I am a patient man
Oh, so patient
A simple man
Who leads a simple life
I open my eyes each daybreak
I walk about
I talk, I work
I return and close my eyes at dusk
The time passes ever quicker
Memories fading into disarray
The worries cease slowly
I grow steady as a boulder in a breeze
But,
Sometimes in the early sleepless hours
Sometimes, in the restless hours
Occasionally,
I hear the sounds of tumult from afar...
The waters rage above me,
Boiling more and more rapidly,
The chains shackling me creak and groan,
Their weight suddenly oppressive as the world.
I could jump
I could leap
I could soar
Away from all that binds me
Crushing all the strings that bind me
Free from this pit of death
Yet I persist.
I close my eyes again tonight
Tomorrow the horror shall vanish
Lost in the oblivion of the mundane
And I shall remain here
Slowly
Patiently
Gradually dying
In a shallow pot of stewing life
A Modern Girl
She's a nihilist and a hedonist,
A female chauvinist,
Obsessed in her abandon,
A conditioned hellion.
She's a whore and a paramour,
A heart-sore,
Locked into her rythm,
A dangerous symptom.
She's a philosopher and a tyrant,
A social aberrant,
Crazed in her liberty,
A pathetic mystery.
A female chauvinist,
Obsessed in her abandon,
A conditioned hellion.
She's a whore and a paramour,
A heart-sore,
Locked into her rythm,
A dangerous symptom.
She's a philosopher and a tyrant,
A social aberrant,
Crazed in her liberty,
A pathetic mystery.
Blue
Life is a weary road
Time a merciless foe
Love is a heavy load
Laughter a prelude of woe
Hope is a path to sorrow
Dreams a measure of tears
Faith is a worthless show
Friends a waste of years
Time a merciless foe
Love is a heavy load
Laughter a prelude of woe
Hope is a path to sorrow
Dreams a measure of tears
Faith is a worthless show
Friends a waste of years
Swordplay
Resignation is the oceans surrounding islands of courage.
A little sight and one would see, beasts gliding about in the depths.
There comes a time when destinations change, and friends
Walking the same road, suddenly have become strangers.
What is is always in need of being broken. In the center
Resides, if but for the moment, the actual, the fact.
Where there is fear, there is the coffin. The coffin is the veil.
The gentle kiss that follows is but an offering to the damned.
The architects of blindness constantly wage war across the earth,
But those who see rest, for the blind can only lead the blind.
Abandon is a twin to joy. Those without either may covet both.
Yet one begets the future, while the other only consumes the present.
How can the child honor its creator? The creation survives the creator,
And there is no hope that what has passed can be remembered.
Words are the mightiness of the wise, and all the wise suffer
The same folly: for none listen, none comprehend, and the world remains as ever.
A little sight and one would see, beasts gliding about in the depths.
There comes a time when destinations change, and friends
Walking the same road, suddenly have become strangers.
What is is always in need of being broken. In the center
Resides, if but for the moment, the actual, the fact.
Where there is fear, there is the coffin. The coffin is the veil.
The gentle kiss that follows is but an offering to the damned.
The architects of blindness constantly wage war across the earth,
But those who see rest, for the blind can only lead the blind.
Abandon is a twin to joy. Those without either may covet both.
Yet one begets the future, while the other only consumes the present.
How can the child honor its creator? The creation survives the creator,
And there is no hope that what has passed can be remembered.
Words are the mightiness of the wise, and all the wise suffer
The same folly: for none listen, none comprehend, and the world remains as ever.
Everybody Needs a Sanctuary
My sanctuaries are all gone.
They have been looted and pillaged,
Burned and broken,
Invaded by the uncouth, the filthy,
The senseless horde.
One by one, I have watched
As they were taken from me.
Now I linger in the rubble
Of what was once, to me, sacred,
Defiled now by those without compassion,
Without love or mercy.
Yet I am at peace.
My sanctuary awaits me.
Mine is the future
And even now, I am laying the bricks;
I am scraping the mortar
Of what shall be.
This, no one can destroy.
What I build this time is destiny itself.
It is the power of resolve, the invincibility of an idea,
And when it is complete, my enemies--
Those who would call themselves my friends--
Shall beat their impotent fists upon its walls
And curse me with every foul breath they can muster.
Yet I shall abide, at last, unencumbered:
Free from their wanton destruction;
Free from their beligerent disregard of truth;
Free from their meddling malice disguised as concern;
Free from their leeching of my every precious resource;
Free from their unconsciousness;
Free from their shackles of uniformity that strive to chain me down.
They have been looted and pillaged,
Burned and broken,
Invaded by the uncouth, the filthy,
The senseless horde.
One by one, I have watched
As they were taken from me.
Now I linger in the rubble
Of what was once, to me, sacred,
Defiled now by those without compassion,
Without love or mercy.
Yet I am at peace.
My sanctuary awaits me.
Mine is the future
And even now, I am laying the bricks;
I am scraping the mortar
Of what shall be.
This, no one can destroy.
What I build this time is destiny itself.
It is the power of resolve, the invincibility of an idea,
And when it is complete, my enemies--
Those who would call themselves my friends--
Shall beat their impotent fists upon its walls
And curse me with every foul breath they can muster.
Yet I shall abide, at last, unencumbered:
Free from their wanton destruction;
Free from their beligerent disregard of truth;
Free from their meddling malice disguised as concern;
Free from their leeching of my every precious resource;
Free from their unconsciousness;
Free from their shackles of uniformity that strive to chain me down.
Embarrassing Company
so...
you want it this way and that
i shall wear a nice hat
lie flat on the seat of a train
carry an umbrealla through the rain
wear gloves and a certain coat
speak words of a certain rote
and never smoke
so...
you like the ooo's and the ahh's
i shall measure a pause
and break out in conceding applause
i shall put the right name to the face
and mention the superior race
we shall walk a particular pace
and never confess that our haste
is simply a mess
so...
you love the boys and the girls
and all the artificial curls
expensive pearls designer suits
lace handkerchiefs and snakeskin boots
japanese cars and a billion stars
couldn't captivate your heart
more than some other loot
so...
you think me empty and vain
consider restraint a taint
of those who have not a brain
well...
I gladly refrain
you want it this way and that
i shall wear a nice hat
lie flat on the seat of a train
carry an umbrealla through the rain
wear gloves and a certain coat
speak words of a certain rote
and never smoke
so...
you like the ooo's and the ahh's
i shall measure a pause
and break out in conceding applause
i shall put the right name to the face
and mention the superior race
we shall walk a particular pace
and never confess that our haste
is simply a mess
so...
you love the boys and the girls
and all the artificial curls
expensive pearls designer suits
lace handkerchiefs and snakeskin boots
japanese cars and a billion stars
couldn't captivate your heart
more than some other loot
so...
you think me empty and vain
consider restraint a taint
of those who have not a brain
well...
I gladly refrain
About the Author
E'er swiftly flows the tide
That measures our achievements
As a border ringing round
From the moment of inception
To the moment that we died.
What virtue then is boasting
When all praise is eulogy
And those that we inspire
Will never know whose effigy
They honor with faint words?
For as the grown child
They speak of wild
Moments remembered falsely--
One perfect smile
Another infinite trial.
But I perceive
Each one of us receive
Simply enough to believe.
Thus we conceive
A means to recede.
That measures our achievements
As a border ringing round
From the moment of inception
To the moment that we died.
What virtue then is boasting
When all praise is eulogy
And those that we inspire
Will never know whose effigy
They honor with faint words?
For as the grown child
They speak of wild
Moments remembered falsely--
One perfect smile
Another infinite trial.
But I perceive
Each one of us receive
Simply enough to believe.
Thus we conceive
A means to recede.
A March Muse
It is time
The mighty traveler has circumnavigated all
The expedition is complete
And he stands again where he began
He has journeyed to the four winds
A shadow speaking dark words
A brilliant figure beckoning but once
A stranger whispering impossible riddles
And then himself again
But now in possession of the gift
That elixir that though forbidden
Must be obtained at whatever cost
It is named
To do good and evil like a god
To square the circle
To return to the centre of the soul
The mighty traveler has circumnavigated all
The expedition is complete
And he stands again where he began
He has journeyed to the four winds
A shadow speaking dark words
A brilliant figure beckoning but once
A stranger whispering impossible riddles
And then himself again
But now in possession of the gift
That elixir that though forbidden
Must be obtained at whatever cost
It is named
To do good and evil like a god
To square the circle
To return to the centre of the soul
On Seeing a Blind Girl Worship
blind girl, blind girl,
lost in a darkness river,
drowning, drowning,
then, rythm! patter-patter,
a footstep, clap clap,
you can see it in her eyes
blank and staring wide
at the form of the noise
"rejoice" her blank eyes cry
drum roll, her feet shift
the ground begins to form
heart stop, the beat lifts
crescendos all around
odd-eyed and off-balance
she stumbles to the tune
leading in the dance that should be
filling this stony room
but the rest of the worshipers
fix their lying eyes
on the words they are chanting
until the time dies
still as statues
lips moving in rows
eyes bending backward to mock
her oratorical throes
they finish and file out
into the devil's arms
she stumbles after
betraying with halting step
the fact
that she walks in a world of light
lost in a darkness river,
drowning, drowning,
then, rythm! patter-patter,
a footstep, clap clap,
you can see it in her eyes
blank and staring wide
at the form of the noise
"rejoice" her blank eyes cry
drum roll, her feet shift
the ground begins to form
heart stop, the beat lifts
crescendos all around
odd-eyed and off-balance
she stumbles to the tune
leading in the dance that should be
filling this stony room
but the rest of the worshipers
fix their lying eyes
on the words they are chanting
until the time dies
still as statues
lips moving in rows
eyes bending backward to mock
her oratorical throes
they finish and file out
into the devil's arms
she stumbles after
betraying with halting step
the fact
that she walks in a world of light
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