Embarrassing Company

so...
you want it this way and that
i shall wear a nice hat
lie flat on the seat of a train
carry an umbrealla through the rain
wear gloves and a certain coat
speak words of a certain rote
and never smoke

so...
you like the ooo's and the ahh's
i shall measure a pause
and break out in conceding applause
i shall put the right name to the face
and mention the superior race
we shall walk a particular pace
and never confess that our haste
is simply a mess

so...
you love the boys and the girls
and all the artificial curls
expensive pearls designer suits
lace handkerchiefs and snakeskin boots
japanese cars and a billion stars
couldn't captivate your heart
more than some other loot

so...
you think me empty and vain
consider restraint a taint
of those who have not a brain

well...
I gladly refrain